Many of these “Dear Son” posts likely won’t carry much meaning for you until you’re older and more mature. Children should not be made to understand the gravity of life. That’s part of the appeal of childhood and no one should take that from you. But as I grow older (I’ll turn 40 this year), I realize how much we, as adults, are shackled to the unforgiving progression of our lifetime.
Make no mistake, that doesn’t mean that we don’t have control over our lives. Life, I’m convinced, is equal parts what we do and pure chance. We have no control over chance but we do have control over our decisions. It’s my job to help ensure you make solid decisions. The rest is up to you and the world.
I will say, though, that my own mortality scares me. The older I get, the more aware of my own mortality I become.
The older I get, the more aware of the gravity of life I become.
When you lose someone close to you or someone you can relate to, it makes it all the more difficult not to think about.
The world lost another good soul prematurely over the weekend. Oren Miller was a fellow dad and blogger living in Maryland with his wife and two children.
I didn’t know Oren personally but he was a lot like me in many ways. He loved his kids. He worked really hard for his family and loved them very much. He was only 2 years older than me. He found out he had stage four lung cancer in 2014.
I could be Oren. Oren Miller could be me.
Oren’s passing makes me so very…aware. His story makes me aware of my own mortality. He makes me aware of my lack of control over when it’s my time to depart this earth. He makes me more aware of how much I value you.
Oren lost his battle with cancer. He wasn’t the first father to die prematurely and he won’t be the last, either.
The gravity of life releases no one.
I sincerely hope his children are able to find comfort and overcome their loss. They are who I’m thinking about the most after Oren’s passing.
Oren’s children make me think about you, my sons. They make me feel about my responsibilities toward you. They make me think about my fatherly duties. They remind me that one of my most important jobs is to shelter you from the gravity of life and ensure you’re able to live out your childhood as purely as possible.